Many of you out there may have heard of something called “mom brain,” or “pregnancy brain.” It is often characterized by the absent minded nonsense that a new mom, or pregnant mom, can get herself into. Is it real? Well, according to my good pal, Google, quite a few studies have proven it to be legit. There are still non-believers, but if we get on their side, then this will just seem like a list of things that prove I’m far below average in the intelligence area.
Since giving birth to our twins, I’ve had a number of shining moments. I’d like to blame my “mom brain” for all of these, partially because it might be the cause, and partially because it makes me feel better. If you’d like reasons to feel better about yourself, or are just curious about what one might do when she has mom brain, see the list below.
1. Taking my pants off to pump. Everyone knows you can pump with your pants on. I don’t know why I do this 99% of the time.
2. Made it all the way out the door in a slipper and a flip flop.
3. Banged my head on the shower when leaning for the faucet.
4. Banged my head on the nightstand.
5. Banged my head on the nightstand, again. One day later…I could see it coming, but it still happened?!
6. Needed new pump parts, checked the Babies R Us website for in-store availability, went to pick them up, bought the wrong parts. I even looked up the wrong parts. Everything was wrong about this from the beginning.
7. Found my glasses, lost my glasses. Found my sunglasses, lost my sunglasses. Found my other sunglasses. At least I never lose the babies’ stuff.
8. Called Hudson’s legs his “back legs.” What? They’re on all fours a lot of the time, it’s confusing. Plus, I was just a dog mom before this!
9. Called Hudson’s arms his “front legs.” COME ON.
10. Called one of the babies’ arms his “front arms.” Getting closer!
11. Asked my husband to sniff my hair, to find out if I washed it.
12. Called the twins by the wrong names while they had identifying bibs on (many times).
13. Washed clothes in the hotel laundry, went to switch them to the dryer, but instead, moved them into another washer. Turned it on and everything.
14. Made a shopping list on my phone and deleted it twice in the same trip.
15. Knocked deodorant into the toilet. I went to scoop it out, but when I leaned over, I flushed it. I have no explanation for this. I then had to go buy a plunger. Derrick got it out…he was so happy.
16. Went to the store 3 days in a row and forgot new deodorant (to replace my toilet deodorant) every time.
17. Considered myself “ready” to go, while still not having shorts on.
18. Buckled only ONE baby’s car seat in. Don’t worry, I looked into the back seats before we went anywhere and realized the mistake. Note: If you have two kids and get the feeling you’ve already done something, you probably have…and probably have to go do it again for another kid.
19. I forgot which color of toothbrush was mine, so I bought two new ones in bold colors to help me out. I still don’t remember which one I picked to be mine, so I’ve been using the color I like. Sorry Derrick, I like blue and orange equally.
20. Probably forgot many things to put on this list.
Well, that about wraps it up (maybe). I’m sure my future holds many more little slip-ups, but I’m hoping for the best. I would love to hear how everyone else’s post-labor brains have worked for them, ha. Feel free to message, comment, or just laugh at me.